When I was 15, my parent got divorced and my mom moved away. I was angry, but mostly I was angry at God.  If anyone asked me about God, I would say, ” I hate God. I don’t want anything to do with him.”

I joined the military. I partied, drank, and lived fast. If I had a boyfriend, sex was just part of it. One day, a friend walked me home from a bar. When we got to my place, he came inside to use the restroom, and I fell on my bed, fully clothed, and passed out.  I woke up, unclothed, next to him. I immediately started shoving, hitting, and screaming at him. He sat up and said, ” Your fucking crazy. It was just sex.”

I froze, and he  left. I sat on my bed, and I cried. Where was my life going?  I knew that I had to change.  My life HAD TO change.

That was my first awakening…

Years later, I was married. Chris and I went to mass every Sunday. But we were just going…just following the “rules”.

I used to run. Everyday. Miles and miles. Towards the end of my runs, I would pray for strength. One day, I said, “God, please help me, give me strength”

And I heard a voice very clearly say,” I HAVE BEEN HERE ALL ALONG. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?”

I fell down, got back up, and fell down again. I ran back home…with blood dripping down my knees, and crying all the way.

I kept asking myself, ” Where HAVE I been?” “Where I am going?”

And you know what?  .God said to me, ” I will lead you down a road most will never go.”

This is the end of the beginning  of my story.  Since 2005, I wondered what that road would be. I wondered how God would use me.  Now,  I know.  Finally, it has not only been revealed, but confirmed.  And…I am ready.

More to come later.