I have some time…Isabela is sleeping but she usually only sleeps for 15-30 minutes at a time, so this may be pretty short.
This week started off horrible! Isabela’s reflux was really bad, so I ended up calling her doctor to ask her to switch her medication The doctor agreed with me, and Isabela was switched to Prevacid.
Let me back up a bit. Last Saturday, Isabela decided she wanted nothing to do with Chris! It was horrible, because she was feeling really sick that day and had cried all day. Nothing could console her, and she couldn’t sleep because she kept refluxing. So, by the time Chris got home I really needed a break. As soon as Chris put her in his arms, she started screaming like I have never heard her scream! I took her and calmed her down and tried to put her down in her swing, bouncy seat, boppy pillow, but she just wanted me to hold her. I had been holding her all day, and I really needed to just get out of the house before I pulled all my hair out! We tried giving her a warm bath, which she loves, and then giving her to daddy, but she wasn’t having that!
So, this is bad, but I kind of felt good that she only wanted me, but then I felt bad for Chris, because I knew that he felt horrible.
Chris had a really busy week that week. Since Chris’s daddy leave ended, I had been the one getting up all through the nights with Isabela. Chris works crazy hours, so I wanted him to have his rest. But that week, Isabela rarely saw Chris because he worked so long into the evenings, so I was pretty much the only one she spent time with. We think that may have been a factor, so Chris decided to get up with her once a night, to get some extra bonding time. That seemed to have helped a lot, and so far that one day hasn’t repeated itself (thank GOD).
So, basically, this week kind of felt like hell. Poor little Isa just had a rough time with the reflux, and she barely slept all week. She couldn’t sleep longer than 15 minutes without waking up screaming and throwing up. Even if she slept in my arms, she would be awake crying within minutes! At night, she would wake up every 30 min-1 hour, and you could just hear all the reflux stuff in her throat. I felt so horrible for her! I don’t care about getting my sleep – I just wanted her to get the rest she needed to recover from all the daytime stimuli.
I know how lucky we are to have a healthy baby, and I know that she will grow out of the reflux by the time she is 1 (hopefully). However, it is so frustrating to see her in pain, and to feel so helpless to do anything about it! I don’t want to sound as if I am complaining, because I’m not, and I know it could be so much worse. WE are soooo lucky that acid reflux is our only problem.
But, sometimes I just feel so exhausted and lonely in all of this. All of my friends who have babies have been pretty lucky, and haven’t had to go through any of this. The girls who were pregnant with me, well their babies have all been sleeping through the night for some time, and they can feed their babies without any trouble at all. Well, I am totally jealous of them, but the point is that I am kinda feeling a little alone in this situation. I have a lot of people I can vent to, but it’s hard to feel like I am getting any kind of validation for my feelings…..and selfish me (: I’m really needing that validation right now. So, if there is anyone out there who has gone through this, let me know! It would just be nice to have an understanding ear.
(Crossing my fingers), The past 3 days and 2 nights have gone pretty well. I pray they continue to go well, and that Isabela’s new medication is really helping her!
Peace.
I hope your nights have been better since this post. What a great idea for Chris to get up with Isa one night a week. Special time for them both. Hang in there, Alicia. I know that having a newborn is filled with joy and also tears. Believe me that it gets easier and too soon you will be thinking back to these days and remembering her first beginnings. I can see what wonderful parents you both are. How lucky litte Isabella is to have you both and all the love you have to give.
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